Have some middle of the night liquid poo. Think that the ordeal is finally over. Get up. Wash hands. Toilet's a bloody mess, had to hose it down. Suddenly my gut is like NO. Had to rush to sit back down. Feel like Willy Wonka, only my sphincter is the chocolate factory. I want off this ride. I think I'm feeling a part three coming up.
I was sleeping so well too. That Chilli's burger I had for dinner sure wasn't worth it. Hell it wasn't even good. Bland unseasoned patty. I'm sticking to the local burger joints.
While listening to random deresute stuff, it led me to this gem. I have discovered this 10 years too late. If only I discovered it while taking a shit.
... on the toilet is a bad idea. The tension makes my buttcheeks clench.