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  1. Stuff that happened

    > An ingrown hair on my chin somehow managed to burst out of its confines and emerge a beautiful flower. I yanked the bitch out. I was planning on gouging my chin open with needles and tweezers at some point like how I usually deal with all my ingrown facial hairs - bloody and horrible but it saved me the trouble.

    > Despite double layering the toilet paper, the remaining poop was somehow the right combination of moist and grainy and significantly compromised the integrity of the ...