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Tales of a Role Player who loves F/sN and Sci-Fi (among other things)

24th Birthday coming up soon... and a bit of Role-Playing humor that I think will be appreciated

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Next Story to be Posted/Updated: Grail Works LTD: Pierre Saga 00

Progress: 0 of 20 pages (0% done)1

Day of the update: ...hopefully by Halloween this year.

So, in 11 days, my 24th Birthday will be coming around the corner. This might not seem so special, and it might not even be special at all, but I just wondered if anyone would say "Happy Birthday" early (since I'm celebrating twice... once today, with a good portion of my family, and once on the day with friends).

Also, if anyone's curious, here's a game joke that came from a D&D campaign:

Role-Playing joke that someone else put online
Bard: “There’s an open portal into Hell right there? Okay, I begin summoning astral devas and sending them through the portal!”

DM: “Ok…now there are devils and angels engaging in a battle ten feet from the party. Hope you can defend yourselves from the friendly fire and the not-so-friendly fire. Ten big devils are heading straight for the bard.”

Demi-god’s child: “I don’t like devils! I use Godfire!” [In this campaign, the semi-deific kid had a once-a-day attack that acted like a small nuke, fire damage for 5-50 dice. Ten-sided dice. She had to channel the attack, with a random 1-20 chance from complete fizzle on a 1 to maximized damage on a 20.]

DM: “…okay. Which devils are you aiming for?”

Kid: “I’m not! Do you think I’m stupid? I’m hitting the portal itself!”

[a short silence ensues, as the DM goggles at the player of the Kid. Then…]

DM: “Ohhhh kay…..roll to see how effectively you channel your Godfire.”

Kid: “Oooooh! A 20!!”

DM: “Right. Well. Then.” [Rolls the save for the portal itself, which it turns out was an actual magic item/artifact.] “Ehm.” [looks to the rest of the group] “Start rolling saves please.”

Group: “What? Why? Huh?”

DM: “She just blew up a gate to Hell. You want to do the math?”

Turns out the Gate failed its save versus destruction; however its dissolution also triggered a massive explosion which in turn forced a save for Every Single Magic Item in the area: including all the ones the party was toting about.

The lucky ones managed a time stop & teleport combo. The Kid, and the Bard, were not so lucky. The DM forced the player of the Kid to roll everyone’s item saves FOR them after the first fifteen minutes.

An hour later, all the rolls were figured, all the damage totted up, and the results were in.

There was a mile deep, five mile wide crater in the earth where there had been a castle and a cave system under it. The Kid was so far gone as to be less than ash, and no one in the party had the ability to resurrect her.

Much later in life, I still hadn’t lived down that moment as the Kid…and people STILL referred to major disasters in combat as “blowing up the gate to Hell.”


1I typically use half-inch margins whenever I get to writing anything these days. Hopefully this won't cause any trouble.