An End
by
, October 4th, 2016 at 06:52 PM (4958 Views)
Dear All,
Five_X has decided to end his relationship with me. After four years (our opinion differs on our experiences of it) he's decided to end it all, without speaking to me once about it.
To be honest, this relationship has never been as fulfilling as it could be. We had aspirations, but turns out only I ever took them seriously.
He met Glow on here in January. Instead of talking about any problems in our relationship with me - his then fiancee - he disclosed them to Glow and anyone else on this forum - as far as I know. He sought his emotional needs from her. This has been going on for nine months, culminating in a sudden decision to go back to Canada and be closer to her in Ontario. He wonders why I get anxious about him having female friends - this is why; he does not know where to draw the line. I know the same can be said of male friends...but he has an affinity for grasping onto the nearest compassionate woman.
Let me reiterate: not once did he try to speak with me about any problems he perceived in this relationship. I have always made myself available, I have always been supportive, and I have always wanted him to be active in finding a middle ground to our solutions for problems. I was his fiancee and he confided in another woman - and she is married. To my knowledge, neither she nor any of you took a step back and advised that he should speak with me about our relationship troubles before making a decision.
He has belittled me. Made me feel small and insecure. Knowing that he has been having an emotional affair these nine months, I couldn't take anymore.
He will say I threatened to kick him out - I loved him so damn much. For my emotional health and wellbeing, it was the sensible thing to do - if he wanted to leave, I couldn't have him still sleeping in my bed; sitting across from me in the living room; sharing the same roof as my family. Only an emotional masochist would do that.
He will say I hit him - I only grabbed at him because he was walking away while I was talking, and I was emotional due to all of this built up frustration from his conduct and him dropping this on me, just as the prospect of having our own home was becoming very real.
A relationship is a partnership - you get what you put in, but clearly, I was the only one taking this relationship seriously.
I wanted to spend more time together - taking a class or something, just so that we could learn and grow together, nurturing our relationship.
He agreed with me on moving to our own home so that we could be free as a couple, instead of being constrained by my family home.
He wanted to live in the UK so badly and to grow and become a better person - I wanted him to start meeting people, setting down roots and feel more comfortable with the UK being his home. To join a writers club or something, to meet like minded people; to gain the experience he desired - he wasn't going to find it sitting in front of a computer.
His only interest: being on the internet, interacting with you in one way or another.
He only started doing a bit more with me in the last few months, not enough time to gauge our development compared to the rest of our time together.
I have never been as happy as I deserved; while he appeared to have all the happiness in the world.
My message to you all: Please, do not treat relationships like accessories. They need to be nurtured and you need to show mutual respect and support for it to work.
Things I never got out of this relationship.
He decides to sneak away with Leo, leaving only a letter that I will never read on my bed - because, frankly, he should have spoken to me.
This is the last time any of you will see me. I know I haven't been here in the last few years, but seeing Five_X on it so frequently, really put me off.
I know it doesn't seem classy, but I can't have Five_X painting me in an unfair light - not sharing the full picture with you, so that you can make up your minds.
Goodbye.