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A burning house

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How Ghosting Haunts the Victims

When somebody ghosts you, you’re often left confused, disappointed, and searching for answers in a whirlwind of uncertainty. You might even start diving into your deepest insecurities, latching onto things you think make you unloveable. A ghost sidesteps conflict and confrontation, but it’s passed onto the victim. Suddenly you’re at conflict with yourself, wondering what you did wrong.

Additionally, the silent treatment creates what Jennice Vilhauer Ph.D. at Psychology Today calls “the ultimate scenario of ambiguity.” You have zero social cues to go on, so you don’t know if you should be worried about the person (are they hurt?), upset at the person (are they really that rude?), upset at yourself (did I screw the pooch again?), or if they’re just so busy they haven’t had a chance to text you back for a week and a half (it’s fine, everything’s fine). If you’ve ever been in that position, you know how maddening it can be.

”I need to feel something, but I don’t know what, so I’ll just feel EVERYTHING!”
How Ghosting Haunts the Ghosts

Ghosting was easy for me in the moment, but I wasn’t doing myself any favors in the long run. Confrontation and conflict might give me anxiety, but the more I backed down from it, the more I wanted to avoid facing other issues. Think about it. Eventually you will have to deal with something—like issues in a relationship you actually want—and you want to be ready for it. But you won’t be mentally prepared if all you know how to do is run.
If you have trouble being open and honest, ghosting only entrenches you in that state of mind. If you can’t share your honest feelings through a text message or phone call, how are you supposed to share them with someone in person? Vulnerability is a good thing, especially when it comes to forming healthy relationships.
Good day.


  1. JetKinen's Avatar
    Ghosts are not real though!

    How can they haunt someone? Or themselves?
  2. Prix with a Silent X's Avatar
    Quote Originally Posted by JetKinen
    Ghosts are not real though!

    How can they haunt someone? Or themselves?
    Read to find out - clickbait!
  3. Apple's Avatar
    I thought ghosting meant giving advice to people in a way that makes them succeed at something they shouldn't have
  4. mAc Chaos's Avatar