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While listening to random deresute stuff, it led me to this gem. I have discovered this 10 years too late. If only I discovered it while taking a shit.
... on the toilet is a bad idea. The tension makes my buttcheeks clench.
And then some dude gets in the cubicle next to you and keeps grunting really loudly followed by horrible butt noises. And sometimes they watch stuff on their phone with the volume up. The worst.
And managed to get a nice complete slice off. Then I felt like something was stuck in my teeth. So I used that piece of nail as a makeshift toothpick. It was quite good at slipping through and poking food out.
Dunno about you losers but my systems are definitely all green. Chris is best girl.