kay4today

i'm a huge fan of real time strategy games and played pretty much everything there is. it's dimmed a little over the years, but i still play stuff like rise of nations every once in a while. i've come across really hard levels, and while they ranged from pretty damn annoying and time consuming (like the great hunt from age of empires, jesus christ converting those elephant archers is a fucking chore) to outright sadistic (protecting that fucking piece of shit sorcerer in the last undead campaign level in warcraft 3) none of them ever felt outright impossible to me. okay, every single mission involving a wonder in age of empires 2 was terrible, but i never felt like throwing myself out of a window after playing them. and eventually i beat every level i've ever played. except one.

every other year (and this whole thing started when i was about 13 years old) i put empire earth's disc into my laptop and think to myself: "this time i'm gonna beat that stupid level no matter what". i dont. i never do. empire earth's campaign levels are generally really unfair, but novaya russia takes it to ridiculous heights. i cant, it's too hard. right from the start there is not a moment of peace in this infernal level. everyone wants you dead the entire time. you have to waste units on protecting your workers all the time because the enemies will attack them restlessly. if you somehow dont hear the sound of tanks shooting at your buildings for more than 1 second, it's probably because they destroyed the building and moved onto the next one and not because you managed to destroy their endlessly respawning tank units. i'm pretty sure the enemies in empire earth all have unlimited resources, because even when i kill all their workers they manage to spew tank units after tank units out of their disgusting holes. plus some of the enemies have giant killer robots, and what do i have? some losers with puny laser guns.

honestly i'm not making it sound as hard as it actually is. that's probably because i cant even express how horrible this level is to me

to this day i have not looked up a guide on this level or a walkthrough or anything like that. no, i refuse. i absolutely refuse with every fiber of my being. i will beat that stupid level on my own even if it kills me

but i will never beat it, i think. i will remember this godawful level on my deathbed. and die with regret and anger