kay4today

i could write a whole essay on why i prefer LGBTQIAA+ - as confusing as the many letters might get to some - over MOGAI (Marginalized Orientations, Gender identities, And Intersex), but i guess i should leave it at this: when pedophiles and people who commit bestiality think your fancy umbrella term applies to them then there might be a problem.

but honestly, i find the MOGAI community very funny. for one, many of them think asexuals (regardless of their romantic attraction) are 'more' marginalized than allosexual gay people by default, solely on the basis that fewer people even believe the lack of sexual attraction is a thing for some. yes, i imagine it sucks that no one acknowledges your existence, but it's not as if gay or bisexual people don't face that problem either. bisexual women are usually regarded as sluts doing it for some dude's attention and "aren't really into girls"; while bisexual men are usually regarded as insecure gay men who just "want to feel straight" once in a while; and lesbians pretty much get the same as bi girls plus the "a dude hurt them once and now they're scared of men" (funny how all the stereotypes go back to "they're all just really attracted to teh menz", lol)

then there's the other obvious issue with it. asexuals dont usually get murdered, thrown out of their homes, beaten up and bullied for being asexual. whenever i point that one out i get accused of playing oppression olympics. which i find funny, because they're the ones who said "oh geez asexuals have it so much worse than everyone" in the first place. if you think no one caring about your lack of sexual attraction is worse than getting bullied over it, then you probably haven't been really bullied before

my other favorite MOGAI subject is how they treat lesbians. the first time i came across someone who claimed she was a "heterosexual lesbian", i was horrified. there's a clear difference between A: lesbians who are unsure of their identity and pressured to like men even if they don't due to compulsory heterosexuality and B: a self-identifying "heterosexual lesbian" who says she only fuckes dudes, but at the same time only is romantically attracted to women, and the reason why she chose to identify as "lesbian" is because she considers romantic attraction more important. look, you may consider it more important, but the "heterosexual" part doesn't mysteriously vanish because of it. are you not seeing the contradiction? "lesbian" means liking women exclusively. you can be an asexual lesbian or an aromantic lesbian, but as soon as you call yourself a lesbian while you consciously pursue sex or something with a dude then you're damaging the lesbian community. (unless you do it as an excuse to kill or rob him of course )

there's also the occasional bout of "you cant police my identity!!!", of course. i'm not policing your idenity, i'm telling you you're wrong. you can consider yourself a vegan too, but if you call yourself a vegan while cramming chicken nuggets in your disgusting maw at the same time some people might not take you seriously. words have meaning, you know? you cant just call yourself a lesbian because you like the word

suffice to say, nowadays i'm not that horrified anymore. whenever i see people identifying as "biromantic lesbian" or whateverthefuck i just swallow my despair and instead do something worthwhile. like making a stupid blog post. or wasting my time watching cartoons i'm way too old for! or reading lesbian fanfiction and hoping i get the, maybe, 1 % of it that's actually good. i can dream.