Spinach

SpinSpin’s Bizarre Vacation: Drought Daredevil Derby

Many are aware of the sizable BL meetup at Anime Expo in LA at the start of July. Many are also aware that a select portion of the initial gathering decided to stay an extra week after AX to be tourists and get shitfaced niipah together. Here will be laid out a modestly accurate recollection of those two weeks. Be advised, gaps in my memory may exist for reasons that will be explained in due time. Also be advised, some of the users who gathered aren’t nearly as prolific in their posting as others. You may have never seen a post by dear JohnRevanTitor, AKA Maple-tan, AKA Sakurafishguy, AKA twitter memester, AKA perfidious waifu of the season man, AKA Yazawa Nico, but all the same he’s one of the BL guys, and was a key figure in SpiSpi Part 666.

These recollections will come in segments containing one to three days, depending on how eventful the day was, as well as how much of the day I can recall in detail enough to write up.

I sure hope you boys present aren’t shy about having a picture show up, because I’m gonna post some in here.

Dawn of the First Day
A lot of hours remain

AKA

Episode One: The Actors Assemble

Wednesday, June 29. My flight out is early in the morning, and I’m also one of the first guys to arrive in LA of the entire crew. I head to the airport and get there at 5am. 4^th of July TSA traffic however is determined to keep me from reaching my flight, and so I fucking missed it. It’s no exaggeration that upon reaching my gate I literally collapsed to the ground dramatically and stared at the ceiling with dead fish eyes while a pair of blonde girls had a giggle at my misfortune, which they also shared in as TSA bodied them too.

I got rerouted through Fort Worth, and suffered extreme mental pain simply touching the ground in the state of Texas. My stay was short though, and I quickly got thrown onto a plane to LA. Two hours later I arrived in LAX and pulled out my phone to start texting the other guys. On the normal schedule I would have arrived at 9am, but the delay got me in at 11am. Roughly half an hour before the aforementioned obscure poster Maple-tan would come in, so I sat around and waited for him. For the rest of the blog I’ll just call him Nico. We met up soon after he came in, then waited together for another Canadian to arrive, this one far more reputable than the last.

That’s right. As you may have guessed, it was Bloble. He came in another 15 or so minutes later and the three of us worked together to get his luggage before it disappeared from LAX. Thus began our struggle to decide WUT DO WE DO??

Bloble played PAD, Nico played Love Live, and I did a 10 roll in GO.

Then we got a text from mAc. He was free and up for lunch. He rolled in about 20 minutes later and picked the three of us up. mAc and I went in for a strong handshake, then transitioned it into an even more powerful hug.

Yadda yadda we drove through LA, got some slightly above average Mexican food, it was Bloble’s first time eating Mexican and it trashed his stomach, so we went to mAc’s loft.

But wait. No we didn’t. We actually returned to LAX to pick up Mooncake, who had come in during our lunch. We crammed his luggage into the trunk THEN went to mAc’s loft.

After checking the loft out I asked mAc to give Bloble and I a lift to our own Airbnb, where I’d be doing checkin for our group. It was only about a 10 minute drive from mAc’s place so we got there fast. I met the husband of our landlord and accidentally asked him if he was her wife. Oops. He laughed it off and gave us the password to get in.

Bloble, mAc and I entered the room, checked it out, then mAc headed back to his place. Thus Bloble and I began checking the AX discord to see how arrival was going. I3uster was delayed by being randomly selected by airport security (I’m not making this shit up) and was on his way, nearly three hours late. He was supposed to have arrived at almost the same time as Mooncake, but things don’t always go according to plan. There was a sudden knock at the door and Bloble and I went to open it together. There stood I3uster carrying a gift for Mary-san (the owner of our Airbnb), standing with good posture expecting an elderly woman to answer his knocking, not two young men.

Silently, Bloble and I stared at I3uster, then looked at each other for a second, then back to I3uster.

Without a single word I slammed the door shut in his face and went to sit back down on the couch.

Timeskip like 5 minutes.

I3uster is in the room with one of his friends, Lukkers, and complains that I haven’t hugged him yet, largely because I was talking to Petri about his arrival which had gone awry. I put my phone down and went for a hug, but at the last second before contact used one of my secret techniques to scoop I3uster up into a princess carry. He was quite thin and overall small, likely due to malnourishment caused by his vegetarian diet, so it was really easy to do. He clung to my neck and proclaimed that all his dreams were coming true.

I let him down then gave him a normal hug, then returned to check on Petri.

He had arrived expecting the three Austrians to be there to uber out of LAX with him, but apparently they went ahead and left him. I3uster acted surprised, as if it was expected that I should have sat at LAX for seven hours to wait for Petri so that I could uber to the apartment together with him, rather than doing the smart thing and staying for an extra hour himself to leave the airport with Petri.

Not actually being particularly argumentative about things that don’t relate to video game opinions I simply called I3uster a retard and called an uber to LAX. Bloble joined me and we went to pick Petri up together. We found him walking around the pickup very easily. He easily stood out with his height combined with his distinctly purple luggage case, and I rushed out onto the pavement to pull him into a hug, then dragged him over to the car. He had been up for about 20 hours with like three hours of sleep or something and was visibly exhausted. Another hour later and we got back to the apartment. Being the most spry of the group, I was up the stairs to the apartment before the other two. As I approached the apartment door it swung open and a shirtless I3uster greeted me with his arms spread like he wanted another hug.

Logically, I took my own shirt off and threw it at his face. I think he dodged it and it landed harmlessly in a corner of the apt.

Timeskip 15 minutes.

Petri exists the restroom in only his underwear having just taken a shower, and finds himself greeted by myself and I3uster sitting shirtless in the living room. Putting on a pair of shorts Petri sits himself at the couch with the two of us.

The Three are united.

Later, another member of I3uster’s Austria crew arrives and greets us all. Further on into the night Frantic arrives, and I’m sure some of you know him. The seven members of Mary-san’s Jolly Apartment have arrived, otherwise known by the name assigned to us by the Council, Memepartment.

Occupants: I3uster, Spinach, Petrikow, Bloble, Frantic Author, Austrian Numero Uno AKA Lukkers, Austrian Numero Dos AKA Wnr AKA Rainman AKA Weedman.

With the sun setting, we retired to our sleeping quarters. One bedroom had four beds, bunkbeds, where the Austrians and Frantic slept. The living room had a couch that Bloble took a liking to, and he set up shop there. Petri and I, being the tallest and being closely bonded in all ways, went to the master bedroom, which had a single queen double bed, which we shared.

A few zzz’s later…

Day 2: Curtain Call

Petri, Fran and I in bed together

We all crawled out of bed pretty early, excited for Thursday, AKA day 0 of AX. After getting in contact with head of the Love Live Loft (which had yet to earn this moniker), mAc, we got into an uber XL together and went to the heart of downtown LA (Memepartment was situationed smack dab between downtown LA and Hollywood, in Koreatown, making this a short drive). Our driver was fairly cool and gave me his actual number to call him for moving us around town since we were a large group of tourists.

I3uster, Frantic and Petri in the back seat together

I forgot to save his number as a contact though so it got lost among countless other numbers, so we never got him again. Sorry dude. For real.

The convention center was completely desolate at this hour. Badge pickup hadn’t even begun yet, and only staff were arriving. We managed to get some rare shots of the convention center’s outside with no crowds after being turned away when we tried to go inside.

Convention center

So, having arrived a fair bit too early, we decided to go on a quest into downtown LA to hook the Europeans up with temporary phone plans in America. After a brief hangout near the Staples Center just two minutes from the convention center we met up with the Love Live Loft’s current arrivals, mAc, Nachos, Mooncake and Nico.

Brief stop at Starbucks for me to get a caffeine hookup, not pictured is myself taking this pic

Pulling out our phones to navigate us we set off as a group of 11 to explore LA and find a place to hook the guys up. We found a small shopping center with a Target and a T-mobile or something store. Petri hooked himself up with a plan there, and we all got a small sandwich snack for free from someone on the street. Cool shit.

Everyone was hungry as shit though and tiny sample sandwiches to advertise business were nowhere enough to sate 11 starved dudes. So naturally we went to the fine dining, exquisite local LA cuisine hub called Subway and got some okay subs. The tomatoes looked pretty piss poor so I don’t think anyone got any on their sandwich. Everything else was okay, much like LA itself.

After eating we got back onto the streets. For some reason I3uster couldn’t get a plan at the first place and we had to find a Verizon store. After a pitstop there I3uster was hooked up, and two more arrivals were on their way. The final members of Love Live Loft, Nachos the Doritosedge and MissingMandible. They ubered to the convention center together while the 11 of us made our way back to the meetup spot. After pulling them out of the crowd introductions were had between the new arrivals and the already arrived, and I recall giving Nachos a large hug, completely unaware of how he would literally nurse me from the brink of death in about 9 hours.

From here we went into the labyrinth of the LA convention center. Badge pickup had begun and there were now literally thousands of people flowing over the streets in a beautiful deluge of weebs. The first cosplay pic taken by the group was of a Rin spotted on the sidewalk, which was taken before we met up with Nachos/Mandible, but I forgot it until now so it’s being mentioned here after that part of the day, deal with it.

Back to the labyrinth. Nachos and Mandible were still carrying their luggage, and we needed to dump it in mAc’s car trunk, which was parked in the convention center garage. Getting in there was a mess and took a while. Our sausage fest crew basically circled the entire center trying to find an entrance, as we needed our AX badges to enter in certain locations.

After getting that affair sorted out we struggled out of the parking garage and returned to the streets. Time to begin the great trial of linecon. Outside the entrance we spotted an amazing pair cosplaying Rem and Ram from Re:zero, and I basically leapt to them to ask for pictures. Fran, carrying a far better camera, ultimately took them for us, so I don’t have them to post here. Just take my word that they were great okay?

Passes were on their way, but we decided to meet up with Reiu before getting in line for them. The guys sat down in a circle and began playing card games, which was interesting. Apparently someone brought a pack of playing cards. Probably Frantic. Fucking Frantic, man.

While that happened mAc called Reiu to try to find her. Despite having never met her and only seeing one or two pictures of her, it was me that spotted her in the crowd. Not because I recognized her, but because she was an isolated individual looking lost and confused. We pulled her into the group and I introduced myself as I3uster.

Get tricked, kiddo. Hah hah hah.

She didn’t believe me for a second.

Anyway, everyone said sup to Reiu, and we entered the line. It was a good line. They gave out free water that tasted like ass and some of memepartment took turns making trick shots to toss theirs into the garbage from our places in line.

Linecon, the beginning

Approaching the final stretch some of us put our hands up to collect highfives from the adjacent linecon-goers, starting with me. My hand felt like it’d been run over by the end of the line, and one particular girl in line actually did a full force, reared back to pick up strength slap to highfive me, which she gave to everyone behind me as well. Needless to say, I fell for her instantly.

We got out passes far faster than expected, as apparently the guys running this convention are actually competent enough to run decent lines. Amazing.

With our badges picked up we… I can’t remember. Did something? I think the main parts of the convention center were still off limits, so we said fuck it and went back to the LLL, leaving Reiu on her own because she’s not cool enough to come to Love Live Loft.

Soon after getting there drinking began to happen.

My memory gets hazy here.

But at some point I traveled a few hours into the future and woke up on the floor of the loft’s bathroom. Shirtless. Beside the toilet. With a blanket on me. At about 1am. I would learn later that I had sneakily approached different people every time I wanted a drink, and had managed to get about 18 shots of a combination of vodka, fireball, and some drink Mooncake had that was fucking delicious as well as like four-six beers to myself while making everyone think I hadn’t had that much to drink.

I threw up in that bathroom until 6am. The entire time, whenever I could be heard puking, my actual guardian angel, the hero of AX to me, my greatest ally, the man I’d take SIX BULLETS for, Nachos, came into the bathroom to check on me. Giving me filtered water to drink and tap water to gargle out the taste of alcohol flavored vomit.

By 6am the fun had left my body and there was nothing remaining to puke, so I came out of the bathroom and laid down on the entryway floor for a bit longer to make sure I was stable.

Certain that I wouldn’t puke I went to where the TV was setup, to find Nachos, Mooncake, Nico shirtless and watching Love Live. Along with them were mAc and Mandible, not shirtless like fucking PUSSIES, but also watching Love Live. I took a spot on the couch beside Nico and watched Love Live for like two hours.

This is how the loft transformed into Love Live Loft.



Thus ends the prologue to AX, and the true adventure begins… in my next blog.